How does talk play such a central role in creating the future?
The answer is at once simple and profound: It's by talking together that we agree on what is real and what is good, what we want and what can stir our minds and excite our hearts.
In our conversations--and especially in the stories we tell about what has been and what is--we create what we desire and what we believe the future can be. We draw from more than face-to-face conversations and we are fed by the dynamic interplay among all the ways we tell stories and create social agreements: sending an e-mail to a friend, watching a television show, reading a book.
This phenomenon has been called the social construction of reality. In essence, we construct our current sense of the way things are, the way things can be, and even the way things ought to be. In the process, we create frameworks that allow us to see some things and not others. Much of what we can see depends upon our context: the time and the place where we live.
This idea is in contrast to the popular notion that individual idiosyncrasies of personality or perception are the only reason people see things differently.
Here's an example: I can almost always find value in situations that others consider dismal. Many people would chalk that up to my "positive" personality, an inherent tendency to see the world through "rose-colored glasses." And maybe there is something in my nature that leans me in this direction, although I can also skillfully identify, and gripe about, things I wish were different.
There's more going on here than positive thinking, happy-faced living, or some individual's peculiarity: I've spent years learning to construct the world this way. I've had practice in countless conversations with colleagues, teachers, clients, therapists, friends. I've learned from books, articles, workshops, lectures. From relationships with people who share a set of beliefs about what's important and what's desirable. And even from relationships with people who hold views that anger me.
Along the way, certain aspects of myself have been brought forward, and others have been left in the background. My more critical self is still in the wings, waiting for his cue. But the constructs I've developed (I hope I've chosen to develop most of them) have allowed other parts of me to take center stage.
In similar ways, each of us learns how to make sense of the world and of ourselves. We use our mental models to actively reach out and construct the world, rather than just passively perceive what's "out there." For most of us, most of the time, this process of making meaning happens beyond our conscious awareness.
Rarely do we examine the frameworks and mental models we have created, our habitual patterns of thought and speech.
Even more rarely do we see that we have a choice in the matter.
Understanding this dynamic opens up significant new potential for social change. It's a liberating prospect: We have many more choices available to us than we usually believe. We can choose, consciously and intentionally, to change our social agreements by changing our conversations, the language we use, the stories we tell. We can open up new possibilities for society.
Popular thought is that we get results through "less talk, more action!" But that's a sure way to perpetuate the status quo, or at best to get incremental improvements. Talk is essential if we are to create fresh ideas and new expectations, and foster the creativity and social innovation that will spark the futures we want. A new maxim is in order: "More talk, bolder action!"
As we're beginning to see, it makes a big difference what the talk is about.