This is a big question and it’s one that’s always on our minds. The answer depends completely on who you’re talking to and who the retreat will be for. There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. (That’s why this step comes after you’ve decided on your “who.”)
Sometimes it’s enough to say: “I've done it. And I've gained so much (or whatever you want to say). I know you. Trust me, this is perfect for you.” Especially when the person extending the invitation is in a trusted, influential relationship with the person being invited.
And sometimes a bit more is called for ...
When you do find yourself puzzling over this question of how to talk about the retreat, here are the questions we use whenever we think about our messages to potential participants. Going through these questions thoroughly, step by step, will lead you to your own answers.
1. Who are your intended retreat participants?
Start with the “who” you chose in the previous module, including the criteria you developed. And now get even more specific. Think about characteristics such as age, gender, education level, family situation, professional situation, geographic location, political or social views, income level … and anything else you can think of that might be relevant to your “who.”
As a next step, identify a particular real person to use as your “avatar.” This is surprisingly useful. You might choose one or two people, or maybe three. But probably not more than that, at least to get started. The aim is to be able to keep a particular individual in mind as you think about the next questions, so you can answer with specifics instead of generalizations.
2. Put yourself in their shoes: what’s on their minds?
These questions may seem simple and brief, but go deeply into them and you’ll find a great deal of insight. Once again, as in the previous work on your “who,” you might be surprised that we focus on problems. To repeat what we said before: That’s because to get the attention of most people, a problem is more compelling as a place to start. And most folks are more willing to invest in solving a problem than in pursuing a possibility.
- What problems do they face? What pain do they feel? What keeps them up at night?
- What’s the cost of those problems (professional, financial, spiritual, emotional)?
- What are their hopes and dreams for the world around them?
- What are their hopes and dreams for themselves (even “secret” dreams they hesitate to tell others)?
- What could it mean to them if they could fulfill those dreams? What would they get?
Go into as much detail as you can, using your imagination and empathy, as well as your personal knowledge of the individual you selected to be an avatar. What words would they use to describe their situation? What story are they telling themselves now about their situation? What story might they like to tell instead? Be as specific and concrete as possible.
3. What do you see them getting out of the retreat?
What specific benefits or outcomes of the retreat would this particular person (or group of people) find valuable? How does the retreat address what’s already on their minds?
Here’s one of many examples: If they have painful lack of clarity about where they’re going with their life, then the compelling picture could give them the benefit of keen clarity that alleviates their confusion, indecision, and lack of direction.
You can draw from what happened for you in the retreat, if that’s relevant. Or you can draw from what you’ve seen happen for others. (We have many examples for different kinds of people.) Or use your imagination as you picture them in the room, how they leave, what happens after.
4. Get out of your own head and start asking questions of real people.
When you actually ask someone about their interests, you may find they are different than you expected. That's one of the advantages of the way the retreat has been designed: It can serve many interests.
So choose someone from your “who” group — someone you feel comfortable with — and ask them the questions in #2 above. You don’t have to have the answers, you’re just trying to see things from their perspective. (If they have questions for you, you can respond later.)
If you can, do this several times. You’ll be amazed at what you’ll learn. We do this continually for our own learning.
What’s less important to talk about?
The “how” of the retreat -- methods used (such as appreciative inquiry), exactly what happens -- all of that is much less important than the specific benefits you’ve come up with above.
Even so, a few aspects of “how” might be useful if the person would find them important, such as:
Strengths-based approach that we use.
Working from (making sense of) one’s own experiences.
Hopeful or “positive” stance (not “positive thinking”).
Theoretical basis in organizational/personal development (instead of “selling” or “persuading” people).
Designed to support social innovation.
Inquiry is often more effective than explanation.
As soon as possible, turn your “explanation” into questions you can ask people who show interest in your retreats. Your application process might include such questions. (We’ll get into the application process in a later module.)
Would you like more support on this?
You might want to schedule one of your calls to talk this through. We are here for you at every step along the way. Or email us a question and we'll answer it so the whole group will benefit.